"If you weren't here, Jeremiah, your family would not have a roof over their head." The tears slowed down, he was looking at me, trying to understand. "If you weren't here, people wouldn't know about Maissade, your hometown. Many people would just think 'Oh, how how sad for those people in Haiti', people who would not have known about your family or a small town in Haiti. But now they do. Do you understand?" His eyes were clearer now, the redness fading, his chin still quivering. A slight nod. "Your family loves you so much! When May and I went last year and took them the gifts you bought for them, the chalkboard for your little brother, Kinche, pictures for your parents that you had drawn. We gave them pictured of you and they squealed and ran around showing your pictures to your family and friends! They were laughing with delight! They love you SOOO much!" I flung my arms open wide, "This much!" The sadness was replaced by a shy grin.
Once in a while, Jeremiah has a small meltdown as he tries not to forget his family. It's usually triggered when he's sad or thinks he's in trouble. It's at these times that I wonder if we did the right thing in bringing him here; agreeing to raise him for his intact, but very poor family. Since adopting him, I've been back twice. The first visit was difficult because Kinche was very sick. I ended up taking him (with papa) to the next town via tap-tap. They have a hospital there and Kinche ended up with his sister in the tuberculosis ward. Jeannika, his older sister was already committed to the ward and we visited with her, surrounded by those being treated with a special cocktail of three meds and separated from the general population. I have been thinking about that time more recently because I had a TB test for my new job (it was negative).
On my second trip there since the adoption, May and I visited Jeremie's family and we had a great time. I showed him a business idea and gave him a small amount of start up capital. It was a way to light up a dark shack with mastick, tin rooking, a clear plastic bottle and some water and glue. We brought them a water filter, clothes and food.
I had held off telling Jeremie these stories because we didn't feel it was the right time. There is a photo album in his room of our trip out there, photos of his family, photos of his first few months here. He had just learned a new language, a new culture. But he has been less emotional recently, easier to talk to about his family without tears. Tonight though, when he was crying and sating that his family did not love him, I just knew the time was right for this talk.
"Jeremiah, do you realize that because of you, people felt compelled to give over $20,000, more than all of the cars in the driveway are worth, to build a well in YOUR hometown! You are here for a BIG purpose! We don't even know all the reasons you are here!" When I took in his fave fully this time, he was a different child, older than his six short years. I could see the man he was going to become, and it gave me hope for the future. "Jeremiah, you may have saved your brother's life and many others that have clean water because of you, and how much your family is part of us. Your papa is my brother, your mama is my sister. Jeannika is like my daughter and Kinche like my son. Thank you, J. We ALL love you very much!"
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